🚫DONT make the same MISTAKE: A lesson I learned the hard way; BE VALUABLE, Not AVAILABLE

 Let’s get one thing straight.

Being kind? Love that for you.
Being available to help everyone? Sweet.
Being everyone’s emotional sponge, homework backup, therapist, and human Siri 24/7? Yeah… no. That’s where I drew the line. Eventually.

And when I say "eventually," I mean after I basically turned into a walking “yes” button and emotionally short-circuited like a glitchy robot during finals week.

Flashback to My “Pick-Me” Girl Phase

There was a time I thought being always available would make me the ultimate friend. The ride-or-die. The “omg you’re literally an angel 🥺” girl.

Spoiler alert: it didn’t.
Instead, I became everyone’s unpaid personal assistant.

People would literally text me:

• “Hey, can you send me your notes?”

• “Can you help me with this argument I’m having with my mom?”

• “Can you explain the entire math chapter to me in 10 mins?”

• “Can I vent? Like, for two hours straight?”

And guess what? I said yes. Every. Single. Time.
Even when I was drowning in my own stress. Even when I hadn’t slept. Even when I really needed someone to ask me if I was okay.

But they didn’t. Because, let’s be honest, when you act like you’re fine all the time, people believe you.

The Plot Twist: Reality Hit Hard

One day, after being emotionally drained by a “friend” (let’s call her Drama Queen Supreme), I opened my notes app and wrote:

“I feel like a phone everyone keeps using but no one ever charges.”

Yeah. That hit me in the gut too.

I realized I was tired—not just regular tired, but very very tired. And for what? People who didn’t even check in unless they needed something?

That’s when I had my main character moment.

Lesson of the Year: Scarcity = Value

Let’s talk real for a second.

If you’re always available, people start to assume you’ll always be there. You become background noise. Like elevator music. Like the Terms & Conditions—visible, but totally ignored.

But when you respect your own time, something wild happens:

• People start noticing your absence.

• They check in more.

• Your "yes" becomes meaningful.

You’re no longer the vending machine friend who gives snacks to anyone who punches a button. You become the gourmet chocolate that people earn. With effort.

So Here’s What I Started Doing:

1. I started saying no. Kindly, but firmly.
   (“Hey, I can’t help right now, I have my own stuff to deal with.” Revolutionary, I know.)

2. I stopped feeling guilty for setting boundaries.
   I mean, even Hogwarts had secret passwords to keep random trolls out, right?

3. I gave my energy to people who gave it back.
   You know, the ones who text, “Hey, just checking in. You okay?” without asking for anything.

Final Boss Message:

You are not WiFi.
You are not unvalueable.
You are not a rescue squad for people who never ask how you are.

You are a limited unique edition. And that makes you valuable. So act like it. Don’t be available to people who treat your presence like background noise.

If God created you free, then why be a slave?

Be kind. But protect your peace like it’s your phone at 1% with no charger in sight.

And to anyone who thinks your boundaries make you "selfish"?
Just smile, flip your metaphorical cloak, and walk away like the boss witch you are. 🧙‍♀️✨

Bcz believe me humans, it doesn't.

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To all the givers, fixers, overthinkers out there: your kindness is gold. Just don’t let it get mined by people who don’t deserve it.

As they say: 'You teach people how to treat you by what you allow.'

#BeValuable
#NotAlwaysAvailable
#ProtectYourPeace

Until next time, (btw plz follow for an awesomeness upgrade)

Shakiba